The Language Experiment

Alma Payne

May 25, 2021

The Language Experiment

I did this activity with my boyfriend in the kitchen and we were talking about my son’s soccer practice. He asked me how was his first practice today, I found the conversation to be awkward because I did not say anything (verbally) but still being able to use my head, hands, and expressions, he was able to grasp my responses, It sort of felt like charades. He id not alter the way he asked his questions but he felt it was weird that it was a one-sided conversation because I was unable to ask question back or give open ended comments which gives him the room carry on the conversation easier. My boyfriend was in control of the conversation, He initiated the topic by asking about how my son’s day was at soccer practice? He definitely had the hand up in the conversation because I was unable to answer back. When it comes to this particular conversation where you can only use non verbal ques, it is a language that everyone world wide will be able to understand. The only thing that would make it culturally a problem if different hand gestures mean something else in different cultures. Like the looking at your watch gesture, means “im in a hurry” or I got to be somewhere”, in the United States, but in the middle east, in a conversation should not run on time, and it would be rude to look at your watch- mid-conversation. SO just depending on who you are talking to it can be taking in different ways. According to concordian.org, “Western cultures, especially that of native English-speakers, tend to view silence as problematic. Worse still, in a Western social context silence is often perceived as a sign of inattention, apathy or even hostility.” (https://www.concordian.net/post/the-sounds-of-silence). According to the famous Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu, "Silence is a source of great strength". In China, silence is often used to indicate agreement and receptiveness. In Asian cultures silence can often be a sign of respect. If an Asian person asks a question, it is considered polite for the listener to pause to consider the answer – even if they know the answer immediately. By not being able to use any gestures it was almost impossible to have a conversation and it actually comes off as rude because the person has no idea what was happen and felt he was being ignored. This assignment was difficult because you can talk to the person., if you cant use and gestures it makes thinks almost impossible to complete a conversation. This assignment has shown me just how important t is to have sign language as a form of communication for those who don’t have the ability to speak verbally. It brings to light how powerful body language, the way we stand the expression on our face can speak volume to us and means just as much as what actually comes out of mouth, but the energy that we put off. In fact, according to tutorialpoints.com, “Our body language helps others identify our emotions, status and even our lifestyle. Non-verbal communication plays a significant role in conjunction with the spoken words. ... Any sign of conflict between the body language and our words can make us appear untrustworthy and deceptive.

Being able to read and understand body language , gives us a better understanding as to the person we are having a conversation with. Body language is more that just something we put on  for an interview and it can only help you get a job opportunity, body language is way more important than we think, and without proper body language, in bland conversation where you are wondering how genuine the person is or how sure they are, there are many difficulties in the absence of body language in places like home, school or the  workplace. So along with paying attention to your body language, you should always pay attention to how people around you use body language to express their opinions - this allows you to accurately determine your next move. So when I think of a body language style that can be taken “the wrong way”, I think of fidgeting, fidgeting may mean that there is a lack of interaction between the two sides of the conversation.  Many people who have anxiety will fidget and people make take that as a sign of rudeness or being impatient, it also a defensive mechanism and is done to self sooth. Turning to other directions rather than talking to each other, or crossing your hands to your chest can mean that the other party does not agree with your opinion, or that the content of the conversation gives them a tendency to close their minds. Loich Batumba, vice president of the student council of EHL, says that he clearly remembers similar experiences: “At the time of my first interview, my interviewer and I barely communicated eye-to-eye, so I could clearly feel that there is a lack of interest between our conversations”.